I Take My Family For Granted

I have had one of those weepy days. One of those days in which you could burst into tears at any given time for no apparent reason. It started last night, when I found myself surfing the blogging world, and came across a blog. www.tebspage.blogspot.com. I don't know how I came across it or who any of these people are on it, but I found myself engrossed in this woman's life. A 30 year old attorney with a 9mo. old son. She started a blog to show off pics of her family to other family members (my reasoning for starting mine), and a few months into it, she got stage IV melanoma cancer. Her blog then turns into her journey with cancer. I have not been able to get her out of my mind all day. Her courage and strength that she shows through her entries is amazing. I keep thinking that this woman is MY age--30. Here she is facing this terminal illness, with a loving husband and child--this could be ME!!
My life seems to be mondane, and dreadfully boring at times. Not being able to go out in public by myself during the day with the kids seems to be wearing on me. I feel myself getting shorter and shorter with my temper lately, and for what reason? Who knows! Reading this woman's blog, I think the weepieness (Not a word, I know) came from knowing that I have not been TRULY thankful to God lately for the situation/family/time that HE has put me in right now. I think I have just been dwelling on the selfish things--MY boredom, MY lack of adult converstation, the feeling of never any ME time, ... Instead, I need to focus on the blessings of 4 wonderful kids, that at one point in our lives we didn't think we would ever be able to have. A husband who surpasses anyone elses (sorry ladies-) who doesn't mind me going out any night after he comes home from work b/c he knows I NEED to just "get out". Kids who are out of this world vivacious--a quote from Dean sums it up, "You would never want to take the spirit out of our kids, but boy would you like to shut it off at times". I need to feel lucky to have healthy, rambunctious kids!! A husband who I can honestly say, makes me feel just as beautiful now-and at times even more so, after 4 kids and 8 years of marriage, as he did when we first met. I need to realize that ALL that I have been given--the good and the bad--comes from HIM!!! B/c ALL of this could be taken away--it is not mine to keep. I have taken the family that God has given me for granted. I have gotten caught up in the day to day living and giving, that I have not even sat back to enjoy my kids at the ages they are at.
Again, I think in reading this women's blog, I realized that I could put my name in any of her entries--30 year old mother with a wonderful husband--but.....would I have been as optimistic or as strong? Would my entries read like hers? Would I be facing death at my doorstep as bravely as she? And I think the thing that has made me weepy, is not knowing.